Borderlands 2 Review

Borderlands 2 (PC)
Developed By: Gearbox Software
Published By: 2k Games
Date of Release: September 18, 2012
Price: $59.99

In the year 2009, the world was buried under the weight of a million bazillion guns. Gearbox Software released Borderlands, and with its randomizing loot system and RPG underpinnings, the world of first person shooters would never be the same again. And now in present day 2012, history seems poised to repeat itself. Borderlands 2 has blasted it's way onto the scene, with enough new guns to sink a grand armada of Titanics. Not to mention the biggest douchebag villain the gaming world has ever seen. It's time to crack open a can of whoopass and get this party rolling. Rolling in shell casings that is.




Now in my opinion the biggest flaw about Borderlands on the PC was the fact that it suffered from a severe case of consolitis. It had a tunnel-vision inducing low FOV (Field of View), and the mouse smoothing was no friend to gamers either. Mods eventually fixed these shortcomings, however it was never a perfect fix. Gearbox listened to the fans though, and Borderlands 2 is exactly how they put it themselves, a love letter to PC gamers. From the near-obscene level of graphical detail options, to the FOV slider right in the menu, they have done the art of PC game making justice. And this is before you even get in to play the freakin game!




Now I'm sure most of you out there have already read up on the different characters in borderlands 2 and have a good understanding of how they play out, with the exception of Salvador the Gunzetrker they are pretty similar to the heroes of the first game. In my opinion Salvador is the star of the show here, with his ability to kick massive ass by dual wielding any two guns you have in your possession. Wanna use a pair of shotguns that shoot rockets? Smoke 'em if you got 'em! Got a pistol and a shotgun? Rock em! Any combo of guns that crosses your mind is the order of the day. Just be sure to save some ammo to shove up Handsome Jack's nose. You know he'd do the same for you.




If you're feelin lonely trudging across Pandora on your own, don't despair. The amazing four-player co-op experience of the original game is back, but this time hosted on Steamworks servers. This means that there's a much smoother experience to be had compared to the Gamespy based original. And once you're done tearing Hyperion a new one, there's no reason to despair! A total of four DLC packs have been planned, and you can pick them all up at a discount now by buying the season pass! Be on the lookout for the Mechromancer character next month as well, she drops in on the 16th! Now, I highly doubt that my opinions are gonna change the minds of anyone out there, because any Borderlands fan worth their pile of ammo will have pre-ordered already to get the extra goodies. But if you're still on the fence, let me just say that Borderlands 2 is damn well worth your money.

Double Dragon Neon Review

Double Dragon Neon
Developed By: WayForward
Published By: Majesco
Date of Release: September 11, 2012
Price: $9.99

Ahh, the 80's. The golden era of pop culture. It brought us many wonderful things such as the NES, Ray-Bans, Transformers, and bigass hair. It also brought us an arcade classic, a 2-player beat-em-up known as Double Dragon. It got everything right, from smashing gameplay to perfectly executed co-op mayhem. And now WayForward has stepped out of the DeLorean to hand us their throwback to the past: Double Dragon Neon. This magnificent tour-de-force blows the 80's head off with a rocket launcher, builds a cyborg out of it's corpse, and then puts said cyborg on a surfboard to the future to kick modern gaming convention in the cojones. All while listening to hair metal on a boombox. It has been a long time since I have seen a game that has this level of insanity taking itself with a gospel level of seriousness.



And what would Double Dragon be without the twin heroes, Billy and Jimmy Lee? WayForward has brought the original dudebros to life with amazingly detailed cel-shaded models. All the classic enemies are here, from the lowly street thug cannon fodder, leather-clad whip-cracking bondage babes, and the infamous Abobo. Add to that the main villian, Skullmageddon, who could easily be described as a skeletal version of The Shredder from TMNT. That is if The Shredder was batsh*t insane and on LSD. This guy is pure evil though, and he makes no bones about trying to pun you to death. On the music front, Jake Kaufman (AKA Virt) has brought the sound of the 80's back to life with a massively awesome mixture of vocal pop and hard rockin hits. The complete soundtrack is downloadable at his Bandcamp page for the low low price of NADA, so check it out!



The gameplay in Double Dragon Neon is largely unchanged from the original game, however there are a few new addons that change things up considerably. As you make your way through the game, defeated enemies will drop mixtapes. These audio treats come in two flavors, upgrade tapes that add to your stats, and Sōsetsuken tapes that add to your special attacks. Be sure to grab as many as you can, because you can stack each tape to further upgrade your stats and moves! The special attacks are quite varied, ranging from a classic cyclone kick to a hadouken-inspired fireball. Be sure to listen to each mixtape as well, the lyrics are quite funny.



I started out playing Double Dragon Neon expecting to play a decent remake of a beloved game. And what I got was an experience that far exceeded my expectations as WayForward gently ripped the 80's a new caboodle, and yanked this glorious beast out of the void. I honestly cannot find a single thing to complain about with this game, other than the lack of online co-op, which WayForward has promised to patch in. So if you are pining for the days of big music, bad puns, and beating the ever-loving crap out of big dudes named Abobo, Double Dragon Neon will NOT disappoint. And it's only gonna take up $10 of your hairspray budget!

They Bleed Pixels Review

They Bleed Pixels
Developed By: Spooky Squid Games
Date of Release: August 29, 2012
Price: $9.99

I am generally a calm person. I approach life's challenges with poise and restraint, taking time to casually find my way through each moment. However sometimes I come across a game that just makes me lose my f*****g s**t. In the past, it was the many iterations of Ninja Gaiden that brought about the doom of many a controller. And then there was Super Meat Boy, an exercise in frustration that I still have not fully conquered to this day. And now in the summer of 2012 I have met my new nemesis, They Bleed Pixels. And oh, what an adorable harbinger of destruction she is.



So imagine if you will a gloriously challenging platformer that demands exact finesse in the vein of the Nintendo-hard games of yore, complete with retro graphics, tight controls, and a rockin chiptune-inspired soundtrack (by DJ Finish Him no less!). That is They Bleed Pixels in a grotesquely Lovecraftian nutshell. When the young heroine is sent to a reform school she uncovers a necronomicon-esque book that fills her dreams with nightmarish horror as she is transformed into an eldritch crab-clawed zombie warrior who must cleanse the world of the undead.



All that side, what really sets They Bleed Pixels out from the crowd is the well thought out control system. Using a standard Xbox360 controller is the best way to experience the carnage, with it's tightly tuned context-sensitive actions that will keep the combos (and the blood) flying. Another nice touch is the way the save system works. By building up your combo chains and collection blood orbs, you gain energy to leave behind a "save sigil". As long as you find a safe spot with no traps or monsters nearby, you can place one almost anywhere, and whenever you die you will continue from it.



All in all the only downside to They Bleed Pixels it is that once the game is over, there's really no way to extend the fun. Hopefully Spooky Squid will someday release a level editor, as I'm sure that fans would enjoy trying their hand-- err claw, at making their own masterpieces of mayhem. Don't get me wrong though, They Bleed Pixels is still a complete experience, and very well polished at that. Fans of the genre should definitely pick it up ASAP.